Etiquettebanner 153fa661ace51f8432021a77ccd4a0aae354b0611deeea4ec931f93ab626a088 Etiquettebannermobile 72ac2c3ac6acba3486141f2cc012a61a1dfaac5b6b9cd6e33a1c8f8b7be5919f

photo by melanie duerkopp

ETIQUETTE GUIDE

anatomy of an invitation suite


Invitation button2 e25ed5cf61d9c3c156dfff676a729b1c14fe23700eabc9d5033c347c6372b770
Reply button 5b45ed13730854ba337efa1d32a7ffde70c3acfb470589232d408b6878259cc0
Savethedate button becfa612f10681b8a974d6267c6f8428f2ad6c6b5b64a1049a9090fc335c4758
Reception button 7ec5300fc8454f33a4fee840de1838f59bf21c8f332ddb0b6d555442e1c1ed3c
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Menu button b208310f7075b97f6c18e9aec5a3555376d601e99133e71e6b6fa151c1c02259
Placecard button 8f4597ff126b26e4c5d699d78dff2d421c96da22ece0f802044df51043f2d382
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Invitation Etiquette

While we are, first and foremost, lovers of love, oglers of beauty, and die-hards for great design, we are also sticklers for punctuation and stalwarts for manners. We believe in knowing the rules and when to break them and we’re convinced that good manners never go out of style, kind of like a great LBD. In essence, in addition to being great with design and printing, we are also your go-tos for everything etiquette and our paper stylists are happy to answer any etiquette-related question you can think of.

We know that while selecting the perfect invitation design and deciding on a stunning color palette totally gives you butterflies, the ins and outs of how to word an invitation suite probably don’t give you the same happy feelings. To make it a little easier on our engaged couples, we created an easy to use guide to serve as inspiration when deciding how to word your suite. Our guide breaks down the anatomy of each card, offers tips and tricks and includes tons of wording examples for every possible scenario. Not seeing what you need? Your paper stylist is happy to guide you.

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1 | HOST LINE

This is the line that typically denotes who is hosting, or paying for the bulk of the wedding. Traditionally, this was the bride’s parents. However, it is increasingly more common for couples to pay for their weddings themselves, or for the bride and groom’s parents to equally share in the cost. Other factors, such as whether the host(s) are married, divorced or remarried will also affect how this portion of the invitation is worded. See below for specific wording options.

2 | REQUEST LINES

The request line usually indicates where the wedding will be held. Honour of your presence: (honour spelled in the British-style with a U) indicates a ceremony held in a house of worship / The pleasure of your company: indicates the ceremony is taking place at a secular location. When both sets of the couple's parents are hosting, this line would specify "at the marriage of their children."

3 | BRIDE & GROOM LINES

The bride always precedes the groom. If her parents are hosting then she will be referred to by her first and middle names only. The groom is referred to by his first, middle and last name.

4 | DATE & TIME LINES

The day of the week usually preceeds the date. Only the day of the week and the month are capitalized. Everything is written out in full, numbers are not used. Traditionally the first letter of the year is capitalized. No portion of the time line is ever capitalized. Time of day is spelled out using o’clock or half after xx o’clock. Evening begins at five o’clock, otherwise it is considered afternoon from noon until four o’clock.

5 | LOCATION LINES

The street address is not usually necessary, unless the event is taking place at a private home or unlisted address. If it is included, street/avenue/road should be written out in full. City and state should always be written out with no abbreviations.

6 | RECEPTION LINES

Especially formal or traditional invitations include this information on a separate card. Otherwise, the reception information can be included on the invitation if there is room. If the ceremony and reception will take place at the same location, you may print "and afterward at the reception" or "reception immediately following." When the reception is held elsewhere, the location goes on a second line.

NOTE ABOUT CAPITALIZATION

Aside from proper nouns, only the day of the week, month and first letter of the year should be capitalized. More often, the first letter of the reception line is also being capitalized, though traditionally it is not.

Extra Details

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Indicating Attire

To provide some guidance for your guests, it is appropriate to include a line in the bottom left or right corners of the wedding invitation specifying what type of attire is requested. Traditional examples include: Black tie - tuxedo or dinner suit for men, formal gown for ladies // Formal/Black tie optional - suit and tie for men, fancy dress for ladies // Semi-formal - suit and tie for men, cocktail dress for ladies // Cocktail attire- suit with tie optional for men, cocktail dress for ladies // Resort casual or beach chic - collared shirt and slacks for men, summer dress with sandals for ladies // Garden party attire - summer suit for men, summer dress for ladies. Only the first letter of this line is ever capitalized on the wedding invitation

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Assembly

When assembling your invitation suite, it is most appropriate to stack the additional pieces in size order and place them on top of the invitation card. The envelope for the reply card should have the flap situated around the front of the reply card so these pieces do not get separated from each other. The entire set can then be secured by a ribbon or bellyband, though this is not necessary. Inner envelopes traditionally enclose the cards within the outer mailing envelope. For details on envelopes, visit our envelope etiquette page.

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THE BIG FAUX PAS | REGISTRY SHARING

One item that should never be included on your letterpress wedding invitation is information as to where you and your fiancé will be registered. Both traditional and modern etiquette experts consider this one of the bigger faux-pas (oh my!) and it should be avoided if at all possible. So how do you provide this information to your guests? Traditionally, word of mouth was the way registries were shared with wedding guests, however, wedding websites are a more modern alternative that can be used to make this information both subtly and easily accessible. The bridal shower invitations are another appropriate place for this detail to be shared.

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WHEN TO MAIL

The standard recommendation for mailing your letterpress wedding invitations is six to eight weeks in advance of the wedding. For destination affairs that require most guests to travel and book plane tickets, sending the invitation suite a bit earlier is often recommended, especially if a save the date is not sent out to guests beforehand. It is important to calculate your send date before placing an invitation order to ensure there is enough time for packaging the invitations and affixing stamps once you have received the suite.

Wording Variations

Bride's Parents Hosting

Mr. and Mrs. James Godfrey Bennet

request the honour of your presence

at the marriage of their daughter

Elizabeth Lauren

to

Fitzwilliam Randolph Darcy

Saturday, the twenty sixth of September

Two thousand twenty

at six o’clock in the evening

Seven Angels Church

Rutherford, California

Reception to follow

Beaulieu Gardens

held in a place of worship

Mr. and Mrs. James Godfrey Bennet

request the honour of your presence

at the marriage of their daughter

Elizabeth Lauren

to

Fitzwilliam Randolph Darcy

Saturday, the twenty sixth of September

Two thousand twenty

at six o’clock in the evening

Beaulieu Gardens

Rutherford, California

and afterward at the reception

not held in a place of worship

Mr. and Mrs. James Godfrey Bennet

request the honour of your presence

at the marriage of their daughter

Elizabeth Lauren

to

Fitzwilliam Randolph Darcy

Son of Mr. and Mrs. William Charles Darcy

Saturday, the twenty sixth of September

Two thousand twenty

at six o’clock in the evening

Seven Angels Church

Rutherford, California

Reception to follow

Beaulieu Gardens

with groom’s parents honored

Both Parents Hosting

Mr. and Mrs. James Godfrey Bennet

and Mr. and Mrs. William Charles Darcy

request the honour of your presence

at the marriage of their daughter

Elizabeth Lauren Bennett

and

Fitzwilliam Randolph Darcy

Saturday, the twenty sixth of September

Two thousand twenty

at six o’clock in the evening

Seven Angels Church

Rutherford, California

Reception to follow

Beaulieu Gardens

held in a place of worship

Mr. and Mrs. James Godfrey Bennet

together with

Mr. and Mrs. William Charles Darcy

request the honour of your presence

at the marriage of their daughter

Elizabeth Lauren

and

Fitzwilliam Randolph Darcy

Saturday, the twenty sixth of September

Two thousand twenty

at six o’clock in the evening

Beaulieu Gardens

Rutherford, California

and afterward at the reception

not held in a place of worship - option 1

Mr. and Mrs. James Godfrey Bennet

and Mr. and Mrs. William Charles Darcy

request the honour of your presence

at the marriage of their daughter

Elizabeth Lauren

and

Fitzwilliam Randolph Darcy

Saturday, the twenty sixth of September

Two thousand twenty

at six o’clock in the evening

Beaulieu Gardens

Rutherford, California

Reception immediately following

not held in a place of worship - option 2

Couple Hosting

Together with their families

Elizabeth Lauren Bennett

and

Fitzwilliam Randolph Darcy

request the honour of your presence

at the celebration of their marriage

Saturday, the twenty sixth of September

Two thousand twenty

at six o’clock in the evening

Seven Angels Church

Rutherford, California

Reception to follow

Beaulieu Gardens

held in a place of worship - option 1

Together with their families

Elizabeth Lauren Bennett

and

Fitzwilliam Randolph Darcy

request the pleasure of your company

at the celebration of their marriage

Saturday, the twenty sixth of September

Two thousand twenty

at six o’clock in the evening

Beaulieu Gardens

Rutherford, California

and afterward at the reception

not held in a place of worship - option 1

Together with their families

Elizabeth Lauren Bennett

and

Fitzwilliam Randolph Darcy

invite you to celebrate

as they join together in marriage

Saturday, the twenty sixth of September

Two thousand twenty

at six o’clock in the evening

Beaulieu Gardens

Rutherford, California

Reception immediately following

not held in a place of worship - option 2

The honour of your presence

is requested at the marriage of

Elizabeth Lauren Bennett

and

Fitzwilliam Randolph Darcy

Saturday, the twenty sixth of September

Two thousand twenty

at six o’clock in the evening

Seven Angels Church

Rutherford, California

Reception to follow

Beaulieu Gardens

held in a place of worship - with titles

The pleasure of your company

is requested at the marriage of

Elizabeth Lauren Bennett

and

Fitzwilliam Randolph Darcy

Saturday, the twenty sixth of September

Two thousand twenty

at six o’clock in the evening

Beaulieu Gardens

Rutherford, California

and afterward at the reception

not held in a place of worship - with titles

The pleasure of your company

is requested at the marriage of

Elizabeth Lauren Bennett

Daughter of Mr. and Mrs. James Godfrey Bennet

and

Fitzwilliam Randolph Darcy

Son of Mr. and Mrs. William Charles Darcy

Saturday, the twenty sixth of September

Two thousand twenty

at six o’clock in the evening

Beaulieu Gardens

Rutherford, California

Reception immediately following

parents honored

Divorced Parents

Ms. Emily Jane Gardiner

Mr. James Godfrey Bennet

request the honour of your presence

at the marriage of their daughter

Elizabeth Lauren

to

Fitzwilliam Randolph Darcy

Saturday, the twenty sixth of September

Two thousand twenty

at six o’clock in the evening

Seven Angels Church

Rutherford, California

Reception to follow

Beaulieu Gardens

bride’s parents divorced, not remarried

Mr. and Mrs. Alexander Ryan Bingley

Mr. and Mrs. James Godfrey Bennet

request the pleasure of your company

at the marriage of their daughter

Elizabeth Lauren Bennett

to

Fitzwilliam Randolph Darcy

Saturday, the twenty sixth of September

Two thousand twenty

at six o’clock in the evening

Beaulieu Gardens

Rutherford, California

and afterward at the reception

bride’s parents divorced, both remarried

Mr. and Mrs. Alexander Ryan Bingley

Mr. James Godfrey Bennet

request the pleasure of your company

at the marriage of their daughter

Elizabeth Lauren Bennett

to

Fitzwilliam Randolph Darcy

Saturday, the twenty sixth of September

Two thousand twenty

at six o’clock in the evening

Beaulieu Gardens

Rutherford, California

Reception immediately following

not held in a place of worship - option 2

*PLEASE NOTE, THE BRIDE’S MOTHER IS ALWAYS LISTED FIRST, UNLESS SHE IS IN NO WAY CONTRIBUTING TO THE COST OF THE WEDDING

Deceased Parent

Mrs. James Godfrey Bennet

request the honour of your presence

at the marriage of her daughter

Elizabeth Lauren

to

Fitzwilliam Randolph Darcy

Saturday, the twenty sixth of September

Two thousand twenty

at six o’clock in the evening

Seven Angels Church

Rutherford, California

Reception to follow

Beaulieu Gardens

widowed parent hosts alone

Mrs. Emily Gardiner Bennet

and Mr. James Godfrey Bennet†

request the pleasure of your company

at the marriage of their daughter

Elizabeth Lauren Bennett

to

Fitzwilliam Randolph Darcy

Saturday, the twenty sixth of September

Two thousand twenty

at six o’clock in the evening

Beaulieu Gardens

Rutherford, California

and afterward at the reception

bride’s parents divorced, both remarried

Mrs. Emily Gardiner Bennet

and the late Mr. James Godfrey Bennet

request the pleasure of your company

at the marriage of their daughter

Elizabeth Lauren Bennett

to

Fitzwilliam Randolph Darcy

Saturday, the twenty sixth of September

Two thousand twenty

at six o’clock in the evening

Beaulieu Gardens

Rutherford, California

Reception immediately following

deceased parent honored

Same Sex Union

Mr. and Mrs. James Godfrey Bennet

request the honour of your presence

at the marriage of her daughter

Charles James

to

Fitzwilliam Randolph Darcy

Saturday, the twenty sixth of September

Two thousand twenty

at six o’clock in the evening

Seven Angels Church

Rutherford, California

Reception to follow

Beaulieu Gardens

one set of parents hosting

Mr. and Mrs. James Godfrey Bennet

and Mr. and Mrs. William Charles Darcy

request the pleasure of your company

at the marriage of their sons/children

Charles James Bennet

and

Fitzwilliam Randolph Darcy

Saturday, the twenty sixth of September

Two thousand twenty

at six o’clock in the evening

Beaulieu Gardens

Rutherford, California

and afterward at the reception

both parents hosting

Because you have shared in our lives,

with your friendship and love, we

Charles James Bennet

to

Fitzwilliam Randolph Darcy

request the pleasure of your company

at our marriage

Saturday, the twenty sixth of September

Two thousand twenty

at six o’clock in the evening

Beaulieu Gardens

Rutherford, California

Reception immediately following

couple hosting